
As nearly 20,000 people poured out of the Staples Center following the Grammys, singer Rihanna refused to leave her seat as hundreds of Beyonce's relatives formed a circle around the Staples Center waiting for her to come out so that they could jump her.
The incident began earlier in the evening when Rhianna won Best Rap/Sung Collaboration with Jay-Z. Rihanna walked up to Beyonce and didn't say hey, hi, cat, dog, or nothing then grabbed Jay-Z's hand and led him up to the stage. At that point Beyonce's sister Solange dialed the number 7 on her cell phone and within minutes over 300 Knowles/Dereon relatives flew from Texas to California on the Creole-copter. The Dereon clan came armed with bricks, baseball bats, box cutters, lead pipes, and, ironically, umbrellas, and formed a circle around the Staples Center, waiting for Rihanna to leave the building.
Beyonce's family was outraged at Rihanna's behavior.
"What she did tonight was very disrespectful." said Beyonce's great-aunt, Cookie Dereon. "Also if you see that big-lipped bastard Jay tell him I got words for him too. "Crazy In Love" won about fiftyleven awards, and his monkey-ass ain't NEVER got onstage with Beyonce to accept an award. Then he had the nerve to get up there and laugh and grin with that tramp Rihanna onstage last night? If I wasn't a saved Christian woman I would curse his motherfuckin' ass out.
As of this morning, Rihanna is still stuck inside the Staples Center, and has reportedly asked her home country of Barbados to send airplanes or an army to help her get out of the Staples Center without having a confrontation with the Knowles/Dereon family. But Beyonce's uncle, Roscoe Dereon said: "She doesn't need any backup. If she's bold enough to be disrespectful she should be bold enough to
take an ass-whooping.
Here is a timeline of the events as they unfolded:
10:15PM - Rihanna wins a Grammy then she basically strips naked and dry-fucks Jay-Z in front of God, T-Pain and everybody. She doesn't even acknowledge Beyonce. It takes Jesus, Joseph, Mary J. Blige, and Fantasia to hold Beyonce back from tackling Rihanna like she's at the Super Bowl.
10:17PM - Solange calls members of the Knowles/Dereon family for assistance.
10:32PM - Over 300 members of the Knowles/Dereon family fly in from Texas and Louisiana to "beat the brakes" off Rihanna.
11:35PM - Thousands of Grammy Awards attendees pour out of the Staples Center. Rihanna does NOT move.
12:00AM - Rihanna remains inside the Staples Center. She forgot that if you're going to show your ass you need at least two homegirls with you in case shit jumps off.
2:37AM - Rihanna sends an S.O.S call to Barbados asking for them to come airlift her out of the Staples Center or at least send fried chicken or tacky fabrics to distract the Dereon family so that she can make her escape.
2:50AM Solange gets the keys to Beyonce's brand new 2008 Maybach and circles Rihanna's hotel in case she decides to sneak out.
2:55AM - Michelle gets the keys to Solange's 1988 Toyota Camry and circles Rihanna's hotel in case she decides to sneak out.
3:05AM - Beyonce's relatives set up camp waiting to jump on Rihanna's ass. Beyonce's uncles starting barbequing in the parking lot, Beyonce's aunts started selling fried fish plates, pickles, and can sodas, and each come with a free copy of Miss Kelly.
4:12AM - Beyonce's relatives begin discussing how hard they are going to slap Rihanna. Beyonce's Aunt Pootsie Dereon says she's going to slap Rihanna into 2012. Beyonce's Aunt Pam Dereon said she's going to slap Rihanna into a movie, (she says Rihanna will be quoting Color Purple lines for a month.) Beyonce's twin cousins Dasani and Aquafina Dereon said they will slap Rihanna's hairline to where it's supposed to be.
4:20AM - Tina Knowles and Tina Turner begin playing Aretha Franklin and Whitney Houston in a game of spades. At around 4:30AM the four send Baby Daniel to the store for Newports, pork rinds, and denture adhesive. Rihanna remains inside.
Please check this site throughout the day as this story develops.
This is not the first time Rihanna has disrespected Beyonce.

45 comments:
Good shit I knew you'd be on this quick like Amy Winehouse on C.... nuff said
OMG!!!!!!!!!
THIS SHIT IS 2 FUNNY!!
U BETTER UPDATE IT THROUGHT OUT THE DAY 2.LOL
This shit is hilarious! I knew as soon as I saw rihanna pull jay on stage last night that u would be on it! LMAO Keep it comin!
OMG!!!!! LMFAOOOOO!!!!!
lol @ free copy of Miss Kelly, no one can get over how bad Miss Kelly flops!hahaha
this is fucking HILARIOUS!!!!!!!!!!
U r freaking hilarious! I love coming to this site.
that is some crazy shit right there. maybe beyonce needs to upgrade her whore ugly ass up.ha ha ha see you ain't all that b**ch
Anonymous said...
that is some crazy shit right there. maybe beyonce needs to upgrade her whore ugly ass up.ha ha ha see you ain't all that b**ch
-------------------
Baby Daniel has traced your IP address and will be at your house in the next 45 minutes.
i friggin LOVE you man
too hilarious
haha...have u heard rihanna had a car accident when she was leaving the staples center???? another car hit her car, i bet it was baby daniel. unfortunately she was not injured..
OMG, the funniest thing i've ever read on a blog. ever... u realy are talented. i love this site. and RIRI is lucky it was my shift at the wig crypt.
This is the funniest blog on the internet. I don't even get into pop culture like that and I am DYING.
0904... you killing it girl. But one more post that doesn't acknowledge me, Jaysky, Swerwolf or none of the othe fiddyleven people that was loyal memebers and non-haters on the boards and I'ma just have to give Lil' Rock a call. He got a shanking partner now.
But all that aside. Grammy's... HOT RIGHT?!?! No I didn't watch but my Itis senses were going crazy. Every time Beyoncé did something truly amazing I could hear Janet Jackson sneeze like she was sneezing her last breath. Anytime Beyoncé said "It's Bey!" I could hear Ashanti sob. Anytime Bey so as much pissed or flexed her coochie muscle I heard Amerie cry out, "Why don't we... why don't we... why don't we... jump this ho!" And then I could hear Baby Daniel Ike Turnerin' a hoe. Crank that eat-the-cake-Annie-Mae.
Oh and yeah... you're so right about this incident. But tell my Dereon's to beware. Some of them Fenty bitches was forming a rally outside of the Airport in Barbados while preparing to hop a flight to LA. I heard they had jerk chicken, rum punch, salt bread and some other shit. And you know when my girl Bey see food she start tryna getcha bodied for a plate.
Just giving you a heads up.
And the next time I click What about my body-body I best to be able to log in and stan for my girl 'cause the chicks or tang masters that run BWBoard recognize me from the streets and say I'm so hood, that I'm no good and them chicks do not want me around.
*dead*
Can I steal this?! I need to steal this. RIGHT NOW.
@Dont Hate Me
I know everytime 0904 post something funny, your hilarious what-happens-next will follow!haha.. Miss the board more and more!
0904 dont wait til we bitch slap u! move your ass and start fixing the forum!
Don't worry Rih-Rih, 10 Task Force Squads form the RBPF are winging their way to you as I type. You know they're the meanest defence squad we got here in Bim. We got your back covered, girl!
Just watch out for that Baby Daniel, he looks like the most dangerous of the lot.
im sooo glad u strted writing these again its hilarious
http://triplerdeezee.blogspot.com/
@Jaysky
*waves like Kizzy waving at success*
Girl I ain't seent you in forever.
We got make some picket signs and protest until 0904 bring back the boards.
I'll bring the plywood you bring the paint.
Oh and Jaysky... I'ma need the link to Amerie's forum.
If I can't ackafool in The Itis forum I'm ackafool somewhere.
Last post of the day...
http://theitis.freeforums.org/
...Enter at your own risk.
hey dont hate me.. .i just registered..hope to see you all soon bitchin like theres no tomorrow..
btw, do you know where's cici???
is that bitch still alive?
Jaysky_27 said...
No, Dont Hate Me,
picketing outside the wigcrypt is VERY unoriginal... the so called rnb chicks had done that, so as the Knowles/Dereon clan.. why dont we just go get a voodoo doll and curse 0904, of course everyone who jois us will get a free copy of Miss Kelly.
I'm about to get FIRED here at my job after reading this shit. LMFAO!!!!
TOO TOO FUNNY!
This is hilarious - - I am laughing so hard I have tears in my eyes...
"Tina Knowles and Tina Turner begin playing Aretha Franklin and Whitney Houston in a game of spades. At around 4:30AM the four send Baby Daniel to the store for Newports, pork rinds, and denture adhesive. Rihanna remains inside."
LMAO!!!!!!!
http://thecoolkidslunchtable@blogspot.com
LMAO at solanges 1988 CAMRY!!!
(d)
that is all. we gon find out who you are damnit and send a rootbocks your way!
All Rihanna has to do is threaten to take Tina's Bedazzler hostage, and alla this would be a WRAP---HA-HA-HA-HA!!! Keep us posted, I'm checking CNN for the newscrawl (*wink*)....
you know solange is miffed that she had to give up her hours at the hot dog stand to watch out for rihanna.
'Scuse me dear sir Motorbike... but I just spoke with Solange and she would like for you to model for HER new line. It's a subsidary of Dereon entitled, "Kikwox". Kikwox was started as a partnership between Solange and Amerie and has already been released in the UK where it has been recieving praise for all circles. She would like you to no only wear Kikwox but she would like for you to Kikwox. Now if you will please take three steps to the you will fall into a trap door. Once you awaken from your trauma-induced sleep you will awaken to find Kizzy running for freedom but her "Massa" Baby Daniel will crack that whip better than Devo and you will also succumb to the power that is Daniel Juelz Smith Esq Jr.
Don't hate me... hate sweatshop managers.
I'm sorry my dear sir... I meant to say take three spaces to the left, right, back or forth. Either way you'll fall into the wig crypt.
*straps on my HOD sneakers*
alright then...brang it...
I fucking love it! You have a new fan in me. Adding to my favs today!
this is so hilarious!!!!!! OMG! LOL...LOVE IT!
This is some funny shiznit.
This is truly one of the funniest post I have ever read. My dear friend, Ms. J. Alexander of America's Next Top Model forwarded it to me. I have spent the past 15 minutes laughing hysterically and forwarding it to all of my friends. You are too funny!!! Keep up the good work...
LMAO... Hilarious
Man...I love this! I posted it on my Facebook page and I did a post about it on my blog over at http://notyouraveragesista.blogspot.com/
This is fuckin hilarious! I am sitting in my office crying trying not to laugh out loud!
That was so funny when Jay made Rihanna look like a fool that can't even speak correctly. I'm sorry but she's ugly and talentless to me. But it was funny how she won in a rap category so isn't that mostly Jay's award.LOL Anyway now Rihanna can join Ashanti and Ciara in the no talent only won 1 grammy club.LOL This site is hilarious BTW. Keep em coming.
Where have you been all my life? This is some Dave Chapelle funny type shyt right here.
OMG! You have the funniest blog I have ever read...i'd go as far as saying it's funnier than mine. Keep it up!!!
That's good for Rihanna's ass! Ha! Don't mess with the Dereon's!!! lol
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