Fuck a Valentine's Day



Today is Valentine's Day. Since I have yet to find anybody to put a ring on it, or at least put a fake gold chain on it, I will be spending the day alone.

No candy.

No flowers.

No romantic dinter.

Nobody is taking me to the picture show.

No humping, pumping, or jumping-jumping.

No romance of any kind.

Just me and some DVDs.

What will you be doing?


50 comments:

e.jay said...

Spending too much time on the internet, per usual, and pampering myself, since no one else is.

I love this site! I wish you updated more b/c you are hilarious, but then maybe the quality of your just would decrease? Who knows.

Anonymous said...

OMG i love this site and im not doing anything just gonna read some old post and crack up lol it fucking Hilarious

Anonymous said...

LOL..hot mess

"I thought I'd be in love by now" too..

So I guess I'll be watching Adult clips on the internet and spending 'time' with my body-body...

h.c said...

Happy V'Day everybody! well i'm sorry for you beyonceitis, i'm sure the right person will come along the way!

melissa said...

Yeah, I'm doing the same thing you're doing.

Jaz said...

im doing the same thing. actually im babysitting right now so i can by myself a v-day gift.

i get myself the best gifts anyway....

Anonymous said...

I'm here with my man and Beyonce dangerously in love song is on the radio :)

Anonymous said...

its just me myself and i. i have no one to wear a freakum dress for. no one is holding me tighter than my dereon jeans. no one is crazy or dangerously in love with me.
v-day sucks and i hate it when people say "happy singles day" like that is supposed to be a good thing. lol

Anonymous said...

lol @ 7.44
BRAVO

sashagirlwho said...

Well, Cliff, Claire, Denise, Theo, Vanessa, Rudy and a Guinness Extra Stout are my dates for tonight, so, no, you're not alone. ;o)

Happy Valentine's Day, y'all!


oh, and "Would somebody PLEASE get me bodied"--lol!

suga said...

Girl at least you have some DVDs. I'm over here broke trying to find FREE movies online lol Bout to drink up two bottles of cheap wine.

Anonymous said...

im glad im not the only lonely one here. lol
have you heard beyonces unreleased i am sasha fierce song "im alone now"?

"im alone now... but i aint lonely!"

Anonymous said...

@12:55

You ain't no kinda right! lmao

Mother Winslow said...

I don't really have plans for today. I was gonna sit on the couch and gain weight, but I didn't have enough snacks to last me an hour... Damn, I need a man.

I wonder what Solange is doing.

Anonymous said...

mmm Iam scared of lonely

Anonymous said...

GUYS,look what i read.it hurt me so bad.WHY PEOPLE HATE BEYONCE THAT MUCH.WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

find on Utube:
good girl gone bad out sold b day please dont the music chart topped irriplaceable. anyone who READS or listen to the radio knows. numbers dont lie. i just find it weird that evertime this 'diva' dosent win an oscar someone gets killed-kidnapped she doesnt win a grammy someone gets beat all because
of an over blown ego which the madtv parody of her in destiny's child even shows. her conspirating in this is not out of the realm of posibility. that was my point.

SO SAD :-(

Anonymous said...

@ 9:16

don't pay any attention to these comments they are made by some dumb people with no life! I realized that a lot of people think that Riri is more succesful than Bee, but that is just not true, Riri doesn't even have a number 1 album, she has about 4 albums I think & she only sold 12 millions wordwide, her big success is on the hot100, she had a lot of number 1 hits in 2008 when Bee was not around, actually when nobody was around at the time she had no competition so she had a lot of buzz, & the media imediatley started saying "move over beyonce" while Bee was not even there to move over! Beyonce made riri, if it wasn't for that rumor about her & Jay that her publicist was smart enough to create nobody would've cared for her, until this time you can't read about riri without beyonce's name pops up! Rihanna's success is overrated, if you really think about it she didn't do much exept from the #1 hits, & if you wanna talk numbers then they are clearly on Bee's side!

Anonymous said...

All i know is if it had been Beyonce she would have taken that beating and still performed at the Grammy’s, and called the cops later.Beyonce is A BITCH

lildrummerboi said...

lol @ 11:03...

She probably would have! U know she aint missin no performance opp.

She woulda had heavy, heavy make up applied, skipped the red carpet, wore a lace-front that had a bangs in the front, performed with the lights dim (possibly with shades on) and any award she may have won woulda been accepted by Daddy Knowles or Hood Chick, Solo.

But nah, I wish Chris and Rih well...Altho I dont condone violence, I will still be pickin up any CD Mr. Brown releases and will continue to give Rihanna the side-eye while singing her singles. Aint ish changing over a beat down...

Anonymous said...

lol @ 11.28

yea sasha wouldnt have let chris hit her. she would have laughed at him @ called him a lil' bitch and then kicked him out the car and sung about it the next day

Anonymous said...

both 1:25 and 11:28 are idiots;
this bitch love the spotlight more than children love xtmas !!
Go and buy solange CD morons !
i am sure jay-e hit/beat her like he did the poor girl in Africa;
Queen Slut and her morons !!

Friend of XTC said...

Uh oh. Does the B'itis Moderator need some Penis? *sad face*

Cheer up, chick. I'm sure its some good, strong, back breaking peen in yo future. Have you tried calling Tyrell Washington?? *bats eyelashes*

Anonymous said...

my valentines day sucked. It's even worse if you have a man but can see him. Our valentines day was better last year together. but we go to different colleges now, so,...sigh! Next year, we'll be together.

Anonymous said...

@11:28
remember the bullshit that ri ri pulled at the grammy’s with jay ( jay was sorry he banged that), this chick is trouble…too bad chris hooked up with her….

i hate commercial DAYS.

Anonymous said...

did you hear that solange collapsed?
she blooged: "I've never passed out before. S**t was like the movies. People standing over me saying 'hello'... My mom is the best. LOL (laugh out loud). She's like 'Ain't nothing wrong with this girl, she need some water and rest... Pull up the car!' LOL"

i can see tina saying that too lol

Anonymous said...

damn you 2:38, you took the words out of my mouth! I was just comming here to make a comment about that! LOL at mama tina, I guess she's really like we think she is!! LOL!

Anonymous said...

to this site owner... I wish you were my bestfriend. you crack me up!

Anonymous said...

OMG can't wait for you next post bring the dramaz this time lol

Anonymous said...

@4:10 pm
You can wait,beleive me,you can wait .... a big event like bey falling on stage at the oscar,or jay fighting with ludacris to protect his wife,TAKE A WATCH AND .............WAIT!!!

Jaz said...

i think beyonceitis just officially claimed kelly rowland's career. her last album flopped and now she is hosting a television fashion show. how long until she goes on dancing with the stars? that sucks

Anonymous said...

hey guys did you hear about that guy who try to kill his ex girlfriend so he shot her but her weave wasn't having it! I can't believe this shit! HER WEAVE STOPED THE BULLET from hitting her head & the women's name is rihanna!!! this is a crazy! I think the creole cumunity should give some kind of award to this women for giving people yet another reason to wear weaves, I also think Beyonce & her mother should start a new line of "superweave" made only for gangsters & gangsters's girlfriends!

Anonymous said...

@ 9:20 am
im wondering how NAPPY that woman's hair had to be to stop a bullet! lol i guess thats why god gave us thick & hard to managae hair huh?
i knew black hair could break combs and brushes but i didnt think it could do that much.

Anonymous said...

yeah that must have been one nappy weave right there! lol! we all sould start wearing weaves, this is a question of life or death! at least we know that our girl Bee is gonna be alright!

Anonymous said...

Both Beyonce and Tyra Banks haven't seen their real scalps since they were teenagers...lol

Anonymous said...

LOL

Let's talk about Beyonce's dress at the Academy Awards ! So sad , i had so much hope . I was hoping that for once she would get it right , a dress that wouldn't be too tight , like the ones she wear at the grammy's or the beautiful Versace gown she wore at the 2006 VMA , one of those elegant beautiful dresses cate blanchett , kate winslet or eva mendes would wear ! But noooooo Mrs. Carter shows up in a vintage House Of Dereon black/gold dress , she looks beautiful as usual , but i'm tired of the expected tacky gold , bedazzled , metallic sh*t !

Go for SIMPLICITY and CLASS & beautiful ACCESORIES beyonce , please i beg of you !! Stop with the Tina Knowles madness .

Anonymous said...

LOL

Let's talk about Beyonce's dress at the Academy Awards ! So sad , i had so much hope . I was hoping that for once she would get it right , a dress that wouldn't be too tight , like the ones she wear at the grammy's or the beautiful Versace gown she wore at the 2006 VMA , one of those elegant beautiful dresses cate blanchett , kate winslet or eva mendes would wear ! But noooooo Mrs. Carter shows up in a vintage House Of Dereon black/gold dress , she looks beautiful as usual , but i'm tired of the expected tacky gold , bedazzled , metallic sh*t !

Go for SIMPLICITY and CLASS & beautiful ACCESORIES beyonce , please i beg of you !! Stop with the Tina Knowles madness .

Anonymous said...

maybe she didnt want to look like every other woman there

Anonymous said...

this is 12:14
im not defending the dress! im just saying maybe she didnt want to blend in or something

but i do think she could choose dresses that flatter her body more sometimes.
i liked the black & gold, but maybe im just tacky too....lol

http://previews5.wireimage.com/images/preview/16563383robirob1222200974446PM.jpg

Anonymous said...

Chris brown slapping Rhianna around will boost her career big time, so Beyonce has some shit to think about. I loved Beyonce last CD: BDay. But this new albulm is straight fuckin garbage! I don't know weather to be mad at Beyonce or Sasha Fierce! She rushed this album out. Very dissapointed!

Anonymous said...

OK.i love the album;
and i love the House of dereon dressf.Look at it,3 times,and now i love it!it's just because is black.I LOVE IT.not bey best dress but i love it,it is so wild,exotic....!!
So sad,she didnt sing live coz Hugh and zac&all cant sing !

Anonymous said...

None of them sang live , it was probably for technical reasons , we all know Beyonce can sing so it's not big deal , and i have to agree with 9:34 PM for the dress !

Anonymous said...

Chris brown slapping Rhianna around will boost her career big time, so Beyonce has some shit to think about


HUH??????????????

Anonymous said...

Well let's see if the public can forgive Bey for dancing & lip synching like they fogived Jennifer for just standing there & lip synching! I don't know what in Dereon hell was Beyonce thinking & I don't know what the fuck is wrong with some of these websites puting her in the best dressed gategorie!! WTF! I mean the dress is king good but those dame golden roses!!
Beyonceitis we need you to make a post about why Beyonce ended up wairing that damn dress & why she was alone at the oscars?!!
& guys did you see alicia keys at the oscars?! LMFAO!!! did you see her wig?!! HILARIOUS!

Anonymous said...

i have to desagree with 9:43
i love the dress,she was stunnig !!!

if she can sing and dance Get me bodied alone for 5 min,sure she can make a duet with Hugh for 4 min.
Please,dont disturb the mod of the blog for this supposely "house of dereon Gate".

Anonymous said...

Matthew knowles,
i just understand why kelly rowland leaves World Music.
there is no promotion arount my Queen album:
-2 NEW SINGLES ARE NOT INVAILABLE ON I-TUNES
-NO LIVE FOR SL,DIVA,HALO AND IIWB 1 MONTH NOW
-NO PROMOTION FOR THE NEW MOVIE

But i remember beyoncé performs crazy in love everywhere it was possible.so,tell your daughter to stop singing etta james's song cause she got 4 singles in the hot100 now how need her help.Or,let bey go to Def JAM like rihanna cause at least ,she lipsings every of her singles everywhere in every continent.
I AM DONE.

Anonymous said...

it's me again (12:42)
so i think dat this part was FOR ME:
Beyonce Stans Act Like She's Janet/Ciara/Ashanti

Beyonce stans act like Beyonce is an artist starving for attention or a comeback, so if by chance she is not on everybody's talk show, morning show, late show, award show, fashion show, and dog show then they make it seem as though she doesn't care about her career and is being lazy. They ignore the fact that she stayed in the Top 5on the album charts for months and had 4 songs in rotation at a time when some popular artists can't get one song played. They ignore the fact that there are a million behind-the-scenes things that have to be done before you go on tour.
OK I GET IT GIRL BUT WE NEED A LIVE OD DIVA.

Anonymous said...

it's me again (12:42)
so i think dat this part was FOR ME:
Beyonce Stans Act Like She's Janet/Ciara/Ashanti

Beyonce stans act like Beyonce is an artist starving for attention or a comeback, so if by chance she is not on everybody's talk show, morning show, late show, award show, fashion show, and dog show then they make it seem as though she doesn't care about her career and is being lazy. They ignore the fact that she stayed in the Top 5on the album charts for months and had 4 songs in rotation at a time when some popular artists can't get one song played. They ignore the fact that there are a million behind-the-scenes things that have to be done before you go on tour.
OK I GET IT GIRL BUT WE NEED A LIVE OD DIVA.

Anonymous said...

it's me again (12:42)
so i think dat this part was FOR ME:
Beyonce Stans Act Like She's Janet/Ciara/Ashanti

Beyonce stans act like Beyonce is an artist starving for attention or a comeback, so if by chance she is not on everybody's talk show, morning show, late show, award show, fashion show, and dog show then they make it seem as though she doesn't care about her career and is being lazy. They ignore the fact that she stayed in the Top 5on the album charts for months and had 4 songs in rotation at a time when some popular artists can't get one song played. They ignore the fact that there are a million behind-the-scenes things that have to be done before you go on tour.
OK I GET IT GIRL BUT WE NEED A LIVE OD DIVA.

Anonymous said...

it's me again (12:42)
so i think dat this part was FOR ME:
Beyonce Stans Act Like She's Janet/Ciara/Ashanti

Beyonce stans act like Beyonce is an artist starving for attention or a comeback, so if by chance she is not on everybody's talk show, morning show, late show, award show, fashion show, and dog show then they make it seem as though she doesn't care about her career and is being lazy. They ignore the fact that she stayed in the Top 5on the album charts for months and had 4 songs in rotation at a time when some popular artists can't get one song played. They ignore the fact that there are a million behind-the-scenes things that have to be done before you go on tour.
OK I GET IT GIRL BUT WE NEED A LIVE OD DIVA.

Anonymous said...

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