Battle of the Divas: Round 2

Keri... (sigh) what are you so angry about honey? 9 times out 10 the female you were referring to in your little verse was not the one responsible for your album
getting pushed back 54 times (as I predicted).

I'm usually not one to get into artist beefing. To me it's silly, childish, and honestly, I feel that if you have enough confidence in yourself, your talent, and the product you're trying to sell then you should not try to get publicity by taking cheap shots at people. Some people still seem to be confused as to whether or not Keri Hilson is talking about Beyonce. Well I'm here to end all speculation.

She is talking about Beyonce! And it's just as plain as the wig on her head.

"Your vision cloudy if you think that you da best/You can dance/she can sing/but need to move it to the le...(Don't do it to 'em shawty!)/She need to go have some babies/she need to sit down she fake/them other chicks ain't even worth talkin bout..."

Are you still confused?

Let's eliminate other suspects:

Alicia Keys

Your vision cloudy if you think that you da best: Alicia is one of the best we have, but she has never made a "big deal" about of it.

You can dance: Alicia is not known for her dancing.

She can sing: Yes she can.

She need to go have some babies: With that other woman's husband? LOL

She need to sit down she fake: Alicia is real. She plays the piano, she writes books and stuff, she's from New York, she has extensions in her hair, bamboo earrings, At least 2 pair. [1]


Janet Jackson

Your vision cloudy if you think that you da best: She's a legend, but doesn't go around broadcasting it. This would be aimed more towards Janet stans than Janet.

You can dance: Sorta kinda...she can't hit that Stanky Leg like she used to back in the day but she still got some moves.

She can sing: Not really. Nope.

She need to go have some babies: She's no longer in her optimal child-bearing years.

She need to sit down she fake: I don't know... Janet might cut a bitch...


Ashanti

Your vision cloudy if you think that you da best: Her vision would have to be cloudy and her ears would have to be clogged to think she was the best.

You can dance: Let's not do this.

She can sing: I told myself I would be nicer in 2009.

She need to go have some babies: Her and Cornell would make some pretty nigglets. Plus she got those child-bearing hips.

She need to sit down she fake: I don't think we can call Ashanti fake. She seems like she would be a load of fun to hang out with and hit up the outlet malls.


Ciara:

Your vision cloudy if you think that you da best: Wouldn't you need to release an album on time to even be considered one of the best.

You can dance: She's one of our best dancers...

She can sing: Errrr....ummm...ooooh...damn.

She need to go have some babies: Ciara does not have female reproductive organs.

She need to sit down she fake: I don't think she's fake, but that VIBE magazine cover fiasco could have been handled differently. I like CiCi, but if you're gonna toot that thang up and spread your lips apart on the cover of a national magazine be proud of it...

Rihanna

Your vision cloudy if you think that you da best: She has never really said she was the best.

You can dance: Fuck you, ok!

She can sing: Eh...eh...eh...

She need to go have some babies: Maybe she can have a daughter. It's always nice to have a homegirl to help you fight.

She need to sit down she fake: She's probably one of the most image-driven artists in history, but I wouldn't say she's fake.


Beyonce:

Your vision cloudy if you think that you da best: Jay-Z calls her the hottest chick the game. President and First Lady Obama, Chris Martin, Tina Turner, and millions of fans around the world co-sign.

You can dance: Yes she can, and anybody who says different is a damn hater!

She can sing: Yes she can, and anybody who says different is a damn hater!

She need to go have some babies: She's already pregnant. I read it at BeyonceWorld.

She need to sit down she fake: I mean just because she don't fuck for tracks, or do illegal shit in parking lots, or have 6 babies fathers, or hasn't smoked up all her royalty checks doesn't make her fake...but I understand...


By process of elimination we can deduce that Miss Hilson was talking about our Saviour Queen Creole. And that's fine by me. But I just wish people would name names and stop talking out the side of their neck. If you bold enough to talk shit, be bold enough to name names and get the ass-whoopin that comes along with it. I'm not really mad. Everybody is entitled to their opinion, but when I get home Imma call Solange, Tina and Big Lil' Baby D. And we they get ahold the mess that was said... somebody's album and wig are gonna get pushed back.

But let's give Keri the benefit of the doubt and assume for a minute that she's NOT talking about Sasha. What's the point? Her album is still going to debut at #776, and now she has gone and aliented sensitve ass Ciara and Beyonce stans. If I were a new artist I would be trying to steal as many artists' fans as possible, not piss them off. I would be on 106 and Park talking about how much I loved Beyonce, Ciara, Rihanna, LaToya, Kima, Keisha, and Pam, even if in the back of my mind I couldn't stand those bitches. The reason why is because at this point in the game and your career you can't afford to lose potential album sales.

And why is it that it's always artists of questionable talent and relevance that's taking shots at people. For once I would like to see Alicia Keys call out Beyonce. Or Jill Scott try to tittybox Erykah Badu. Those would be REAL battles. Keri Hilson versus Beyonce is laughable. Keri doesn't have half of Beyonce' stage presence or vocal talent, and damn sure not her record sales. I'm sure her album will be good, but it better be since she's been working on it since Clinton was in office. To sum up my point, it's ok to be angry about the your album getting pushed back, but you shouldn't talk like that until you can back it up.




[1] Name that tune.


46 comments:

wigcryptcreeper said...

I can't even deal with you! LMAO

Ciara and Rihanna's "Can you sing" had me dying!

*dead*

In other news: She's trying to say she'd never diss Beyonce and that it was all Polow de Pon's idea.

That's what happens when you get caught in a fight you can't win.

deny
deny
deny

wigcryptcreeper said...

Oh and sorry: "Around The Way Girl"! I was JUST bumping that song earlier today!

I need to meet you! lol

cj said...

This bish has taken shots at Queen Creole...

She must die a horrid Death.

Anonymous said...

HOLY SAVIOR QUEEN CREOLE!!
WE ARE SO BLESS THIS MONTH,CANT BELIEVE IT.

IS THAT THE EFFECT OF A VIP TICKET DONATION AT OUR FAVORITE'S BEYONCE BLOGGER?

IN BEYSUS WE TRUST.

Anonymous said...

*I'm sure her album will be good, but it better be since she's been working on it since Clinton was in office.*DEAD

i begin to hate on alicia more than rihanna cause ppl think that it's great to compare her w/ beyoncé.Just cause i hate the fact that ppl compare beyoncé to anybody

Anonymous said...

Why I thought that song came from the Fresh Prince of Bel-air .He did say that in one episode.

Kima, Keisha, and Pam said...

Yeah but he was quoting the great LL...with his FINE self.

and the Clinton line along with "She's already pregnant. I read it at BeyonceWorld" had me lost.
ROFLMFAO!!!!

Anonymous said...

She only wrote a handful of songs for people.

Shush. Makes me think she going after Neyo. You know songwriter vs. songwriter.

Anonymous said...

Dead @ Titty Boxing.

Anonymous said...

neyo is maybe Gay but he didnt have an uterus !!!

u remind of this stans & her "SL nominated at the oscars".SHAME

Anonymous said...

do white people even know who keri hilson is? ive only seen her name mentioned on all black blogs and websites. i guess she really does need the publicity.

and i dont want alicia keys and beyonce to fight, i want them to do a song together.


ps. can you PLEASE do another "best of sasha fierce pop-up video?"
omg
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EhK9b6Rrbf8

Fletcher's Old Lady said...

I INVENTED TITTYBOXING AND I WANT MY FUCKING CREDIT...

H.C said...

LOL! that was really funny! "but it better be since she's been working on it since Clinton was in office" you killed me with this one!

Anonymous said...

LMAO ROFL LOL OMG LOL YOU'RE HILARIOUS LOL WOW I CAN'T EVEN TELL YOU HOW THIS MADE ME CRACK UP WOW THAT BITCH DONE LOST HER MIND

Anonymous said...

Just read that Keri said it wasnt her idea.
LMAO
LOL
LFMAO,why i am laughing?
because "Love in this club II" dont mean shit to bey.she has a hit,she refuses to perform it at the BET AWARDS W/ USHER;she refuse to make a video to it too.

she has another song with Justin T. who was a better hit (peak position 19),Guess what? No drama w/ white songwriter *cough*neyo*cough;No video,no performance,nothing

Beyonceitis,do you rememder? you was mad at us about this performance we were waiting that night,One person was happy to see that it didnt happen !!!
1-http://wigcrypt.blogspot.com/2008/08/love-in-tub.html

2-http://wigcrypt.blogspot.com/2008/06/i-guess-you-feel-kinda-stupid-huh.html

Anonymous said...

Just read that Keri said it wasnt her idea.
LMAO
LOL
LFMAO,why i am laughing?
because "Love in this club II" dont mean shit to bey.she has a hit,she refuses to perform it at the BET AWARDS W/ USHER;she refuse to make a video to it too.

she has another song with Justin T. who was a better hit (peak position 19),Guess what? No drama w/ white songwriter *cough*neyo*cough;No video,no performance,nothing

Beyonceitis,do you rememder? you was mad at us about this performance we were waiting that night,One person was happy to see that it didnt happen !!!
1-http://wigcrypt.blogspot.com/2008/08/love-in-tub.html

2-http://wigcrypt.blogspot.com/2008/06/i-guess-you-feel-kinda-stupid-huh.html

Anonymous said...

FLASHBACK:
You imagine in your mind how the performance will go, what she will wear, which direction the curl pattern of her wig will go in, you go to Wikipedia and update the BET Awards page, you download bootleg copies of Photoshop and make pictures that say "The King and Queen of R&B" and put it in your siggy. You go to the mall and have them airbrush a shirt with Usher and Beyonce on it so you can wear it to school that day. You pretty much plan your life around this performance. You get off early from the mall... run home and alas...
No Beyonce!

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

And the funniest part.

The really, really funny part.

I mean, the really, really, really funny part.

Lil Wayne was in the audience.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

NOTE:For me it's even more funny when i imagine KERI HILSON SMILING FACE :-D

Anonymous said...

*sorry for the double post

Anonymous said...

why people think that beyoncé only has 2 organs:her uterus and her tights ?

she has a heart too;she can cry too.Be dissing every month can hurt .

Anonymous said...

wow...you're no better for keri the way you talked about these people, none of which who do anything to anyone else.as far as i'm concerned, you and keri are on the same boat.

Deon said...

OMG! This is like just as good as yesterday's post. You are KILLING me.

Anonymous said...

keri better pick what pic she wants to be on the milk cartoon cause beyonce is gonna make her disappear quick lol

Anonymous said...

I LOVE YOU!!!!!! no one tells it like you do. I'm joining you Solange, Tina and Lil D for a "conversation" with keri!!

rihanna sucks said...

LOLOLOLOL OK yes! I'm in denial (kinda). There's NO FUKKIN WAY KeriWHO? would even think about coming for Beyonce.


Um... can you add Attila the Hun to your Hater Chart? Please???? :-)

Anonymous said...

It's Fergie
Your vision cloudy if you think you da best: Fergie does state this several times in Fergalious

You can dance: Yes she can.

You can sing: Fergie has been blowing since kindergarten.

She need to have some babies: Didn't she just get married! Yeah.

She need to sit down she fake: If acting like a black/latino/asian ghetto or the next Lauryn Hill or whatever is clever when we all know you've had money since you had your own tv show at 5 years old. Then Hell to the Yeah!

Check the credits: Keri has written many songs, London Bridge, Fallen in Love, etc

The Legend said...

OMG! I laughed through every word of that! Lmao!!!!! That was so crazy but it was so true!!!

Anonymous said...

lmao you are amazing. please post many many more entries. and i love your ego refrence at the bottem *talk like this til you can back it up*

wigcryptcreeper said...

That Fergie idea is interesting...

Anonymous said...

ll cool j- around the way girl! do i win something?
kudos to keri for getting in some promotion for her career. lol
we all know she needs it.

Anonymous said...

i laughed till i cried REAL tears THANX

Anonymous said...

this website just puts me in a better mood. looking back at your photobucket pictures made me laugh so hard. especially the picture of the holy bible (dereon edition).

please do another "best of sasha fierce" pop up video!

M.J. said...

After that Ashitty comment, you will be getting a bill from my doctor

Anonymous said...

Sorry anon...that song was identified long ago! lol

You get the runner up prize: a signed copy of Sol-Angel and the Hadley Street Dreams and a free two-piece and a biscuit at Popeyes (drink not included).

Anonymous said...

the fergie idea is really really interesting!!!

please add miss pity awards in the chart

and yeah,another pop-up video

DJ Wolff said...

she has extensions in her hair, bamboo earrings, At least 2 pair. [1]

[1] Name that song.
----

"Around The Way Girl" by LL Cool J.

What do I get?

Anonymous said...

It couldn't be Britney she can't sing. She can't even lip sync well. Has already had her children; Is quite fake since I think she is passing for white (She is creole to the fullest); She can dance; Her vision is very cloudy with the manic depressive, drugs, etc; And Keri writes all her songs.

Anonymous said...

Good post! Thank you!

Anonymous said...

LIST OF PEOPLE WHO TRY THE AFFILIATION "THING" WITH BEYONCE

-Rihanna: success**
-Jhudson:success
-Latavia:fail
-Aretha:succes
(she sang for the prez yo)
-solange:fail
-neyo:success
-usher:fail
(jay-z stopped him)
-janet:fail
-Latoya:success
-the Dream: Fail
(4 weeks is not enough for bey stans)
-Arianna,Shane mercado,cubby & al:success
-Etta james:fail
(one word:cadiFLOP)
-sean paul:fail
(jay-z again)
-Tina knowles:success
-Matthew knowles:success
-farrah:fail
-Keri hilson: to be continued ...? ;-D ,i am kidding FAIL

Taj said...

Keri does have quite a voice on her, and her songwriting skills seem to be on point (she`s not repeating the name of her song in her hook 5x.. *cough* *cough*), and she`s articulate as hell for a female artist (talk about an artist having some depth) but she STILL shouldn`t be taking shots at the Queen of Crawfish because she doesn`t have the record sales (or record for that matter) to talk shit yet. Unforgivable!

melissa said...

oh yeah, Keri knew what she was doing....

Anonymous said...

i wish beyonce would do a diva remix and get specific and go hard!! then it'd be interesting...

otherwise, i still have no issue with miss keri baby. lookin' fwd to her album next year.

why i gotta be anonymous?

Anonymous said...

oh and why lawd why u say rihanna should have a little girl to help her fight?? WHYYYYY???

*fatality*

unless its beat 'em down brown's child, it'll fly out her womb and kick her ass. lemme stop, hell is hot.

why i gotta be anonymous?

Jessica said...

Keri needs to sit her lil ablum floppin behind down somewhere. She has talent, i give her that but just because she might have wrote some hits for other people doesn't mean you can start beef with them. I hate that "turnin me on" song...she sounds like a lil 8 year old with all the vocorder ish...then in the song she got the nerve to say "recognize a real woman" i don't hear a real woman in that song...i hear a lil fast tailed girl tryin to get attention...Oh and her lil thing on rip the runway was terrible...i guess she thought it was a concert for her huh? she was blockin the models and everything!!!
I'm done!!!!!!!!!!

Anonymous said...

DJ Wolfe: for third place you win a date with Kelly Rowland! Baby Daniel will be your driv...wait...he blacklisted her? Well I guess Amerie will be your driver.

Jon Moe said...

has anyone even considered that this could even be geared towards Britney...or even Nicole...I think this is a lot of wishful thinking on the part of Beyonce stans in their incessant desire to pit Beyonce against the rest of the music world...

It'sJustTheInternetSilly said...

All the others are good but there's one dead giveaway: "move it to the le..."

She must've forgotten that Bey is TRULY irreplaceable.